This person’s job is to find the humor in you and your problems. Of course, he will usually fail to do so, because there is nothing the slightest bit ridiculous about you or your problems. But his failure in itself you will find calming. And you can pay him next to nothing.
In the end, we who sit on top of the financial world all need to remember that anxiety is a relative thing. The best among us realize that it doesn’t matter how much of it we feel, so long as everyone else in the financial markets feels more of it. And so if you don’t have the stomach for these cutting-edge stress-relieving strategies, you can always just give up trying to reduce your own stress, and instead create more stress for other people. Stage a raid on some totally unsuspecting company, for example, or just go on TV and say you’re getting the hell out of the markets and putting everything into cash.
It’s a less original solution, but it totally works.