Getting clients to invest more and spend less is easier said than done.

Kathy Dollard knows first-hand about the need to save more and spend less from both sides of the advisory fence. To help keep retirement and education savings goals on track, her family has embarked on a moderated spending plan since her husband was laid off from his job earlier this year.

They're foregoing expensive vacations in favor of day trips to Cape Cod, and spending time with friends in Maine. In an effort to cut their clothing expenditures in half from its year-ago level, Dollard, a CFP licensee, has assigned her two teenage children a monthly clothing budget. "It's funny how giving them a fixed amount to spend has helped them recognize when they really need something, and when they don't," she observes wryly.

If only she could bring that lesson home to some clients at her Boxborough, Mass.-based firm, Nashoba Financial Planning. Like other financial advisors interviewed for this story, Dollard finds that, despite serious discussions and computer-generated illustrations about the shortfalls they face if they don't get serious about saving and investing more, some people just can't curb their spending enthusiasm enough to get the job done. "One of the hardest things I have to do as a financial planner," she says, "is to convince people of the need to change their lifestyles."

Dollard is not alone in her observation. Judging from this country's mounting credit card debt and abysmally low savings rate, living beyond one's means never died with the 1980s; it just found its roots and quietly continued to blossom. During the 1990s, individuals could spend freely while feeling secure in the illusion that soaring stock market returns would bridge the gap left by sloppy saving habits. Now, without the safety net of those returns to fall back on, the gamble has gotten much riskier.

Even a severe and sudden blow like a layoff doesn't always prompt a reality check, at least initially. "Some clients who've been laid off strongly resist giving up luxuries, even at the expense of long-term savings plans," says John Moshides of Moshides Financial Planning Group in Buffalo, N.Y. "They try to hold on to a lifestyle longer than they should."

Those hit by layoffs aren't the only ones affected. From individuals hoping to retire early, to parents facing crushing tuition bills in a few years, to retirees who just can't fathom the possibility that they might outlive their savings, the need to bite the spending bullet crosses virtually all lines of class and age.

Moshides knows several wealthy physicians approaching retirement age who buy life and disability insurance through him, but have chosen to manage their own money. "These guys were day traders in the 1990s," he says. "I saw them make ten times their original investment, only to have it come crashing down. I can think of at least five examples of fortunes made and lost within a few short years." Although he hasn't discussed the situation in detail with them, he draws the inevitable and obvious conclusion that they will have to work longer or accept a lower standard of living.

Like other financial advisors, Moshides uses charts and illustrations to show people how much they need to save. But he is also careful to stop short of pushing the point past a client's comfort level. "If someone is intent on taking money out of a retirement account to pay country club dues, there is not much you can say to change his mind," he says. Besides, he adds, a client may have extenuating financial circumstances he is not aware of that permit such financial leeway.

Such leeway usually is not an option for many retired clients of Cathy Pareto of Investor Solutions in Miami. "Sure, we break out the software and drill out reports," she says. "But once you've reached retirement age and have created a certain standard of living, it can be tough to scale back even if the numbers say you should."

Some clients go through a kind of sticker shock when Pareto tells them that tidy six-figure accounts they've worked a lifetime for won't necessarily provide for an elaborate lifestyle for 20 years or more. She recalls one husband and wife in their early seventies, with a balanced portfolio of about $340,000, who recently bought a new Lincoln Town Car and joined an expensive country club against her advice. "In the end, it's their money," she says. "I'll make the point, but I won't resort to scare tactics."

In the quest to get clients to spend less, advisors may find themselves looking for ways to handle a marriage muddle without offending either spouse. Barbara Steinmetz, a CFP licensee who runs Steinmetz Financial Planning in Burlingame, Calif., is working on a detailed, written financial plan for a couple who have been married for five years and have a four-year-old son. The 50-year-old husband, who received a $900,000 inheritance a few months ago, hopes to retire from his $85,000-a-year job in about five years. The couple would also like to send their son to a private school, and accommodate the 44-year-old wife's desire to gift some of their newly found wealth to relatives.

"An inheritance of that size is not a lot of money in this part of the world," says Steinmetz. "I can show them fairly quickly that if they keep spending the way they do, they run the risk of running out of money."

But numbers are one thing, and emotions another. "He admires her generosity, and doesn't want to upset her or question her spending," says Steinmetz. "What I need to do is reinforce the idea that all things we do in life involve choices, and do it without busting their self-esteem."

From Advice To Action

While clients often may need to make lifestyle adjustments, getting them to move in that direction requires providing advice without sounding like a taskmaster, or a salesperson motivated solely by the desire to divert fun money into fees or commissions. Below are some techniques that planners have found useful.

Hit a "hot button." "Everyone has a hot-button goal that makes them want to save," says Steinmetz. "For my son and daughter-in-law, the vision of buying a house motivates them to put money into their house account every month." She finds that quantifying what it takes to reach goals also helps. "If you tell someone they won't be able to retire early, that only discourages them," she says. "If you say you can retire in five years instead of three, and here's what you need to do to make it happen, it makes the goal more real and reachable. And if you know a client well enough, you probably have a pretty good idea of what will get them fired up and what will offend."

Personalize budgeting advice. Some advisors find the classic advice of drawing up a detailed budget to see where money is leaking scares people into inaction. "If you tell people they have to write down each and every expenditure and draw up a detailed budget, they just won't do it," says Dollard. Steinmetz agrees that being too restrictive about expenditures often creates a backlash. "If I say, 'You're going on a diet and will never be able to eat chocolate again,' you'll run for the chocolate," she says. Instead, Dollard asks clients to separate discretionary and non-discretionary expenses, and to do an honest assessment of what they really need and what they can live without.

Others may need a more disciplined approach, particularly when spending issues persistently derail personal savings. A relatively new entry into the budgeting software arena is Mvelopes (mvelopes.com), a program that allows users to track expenditures as they make them, rather than after the fact. Earlier this year, Mvelopes began selling multiple copies of the software and an accompanying book to financial advisors. The goal for advisors, says vice president of marketing Dave Neddo, is to distribute the materials to clients or potential clients who just can't seem to fit saving and investing into their budget plans. "If the system can recover 10% of someone's income, the money that would have flown out the door can be diverted into investment products or services," he says.

Go automatic. Putting in place an automatic investment plan removes temptation. "It instills discipline very quickly," says Pareto. "If someone commits to not having that extra $800 a month, it becomes easier to re-shape spending habits."

Look at the total picture. Financial advisors who haven't paid much attention to someone's total financial picture, then suddenly take an interest in budgeting matters, run the risk of sounding like they're going into sales overdrive. "Putting a financial game plan in place is important whether someone needs to cut back spending or not," says Leo Pusateri, President of Pusateri Consulting and Training, Buffalo, N.Y. "You need to take a holistic approach from the beginning."

Show you're on their side of the table. Showing empathy instills the kind of trust that helps translate advice into action. "It's a tough time for a lot of people out there, and they need to know that you're on their side of the table," says Pusateri. "Ask good, penetrating questions respectfully, rather than rattling off what they should do. Before people adjust, they need to align."