Walking out of the meeting. Ideally, you will have vetted the family to determine if they can manage a meeting without unraveling at the seams. But you may still see people storm out of the meeting. Spacing of rule of thumb below...
Rule Of Thumb: Depending on how dramatic the exit, the discussion may continue or come to a halt. The first task of the facilitator is usually to direct the group's attention to what has happened and, if no one does so spontaneously, to ask someone to go find the person who left. Start with the individual whom you think will have the best chance of bringing the person back. Ask the group about what they think happened and whether it has happened before. When the person returns, you can extend this line of inquiry, while trying to understand the forces at play that might have led to the departure. Do not drop your stance of compassionate curiosity, as it will serve you well in this circumstance as well as many others.
While there are some circumstances that may dictate the use of an outside facilitator, it's a role that advisors can play and get better at over time. Your ability to know when to hold meetings, as well as how to execute them, will grow with practice along with supervision and feedback from peers.
There is much to consider when running
family meetings. Good preparation with respect to goals, objectives
and meeting design can go a long way toward achieving a highly
effective and successful result. A well-run family meeting, even if you
zigzag to the perfect outcome, improves family financial
decision-making and your standing as a servant of positive change in
the family. Moreover, your role in relation to the family will be
strengthened.
False starts and wasted encounters will be avoided.
A productive meeting will introduce new forms of transparency into the family system in measured doses. You will democratize family decision-making and, as a result, set the stage for greater participation in family wealth solutions.
G. Scott Budge, Ph.D., is a managing director of RayLign Advisory, LLC, a Greenwich, Conn.-based firm that serves as a consultant to wealthy families. Scott's expertise in the dynamics of wealthy families and their advisory systems is based on his clinical work as a psychologist, strategic leadership at a leading investments company and consulting engagements with entrepreneurs, wealth advisors and family offices. This article is an abridged excerpt from his book, "The New Financial Advisor: Strategies for Successful Family Wealth Management." Copyright (c) 2008 by G. Scott Budge. Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc. Used with permission. Book available online and in bookstores.