While not an exact science, the study of people making the transition from work-life to home-life is nothing short of remarkable. Not because of one’s abilities to adapt and thrive but more so because of the anomalies in thoughts, feelings and behaviors that can appear.
While the science is still in its infancy, ongoing research and studies continue to shed new light on gaps in the traditional treatment and evolution of retired clients. As a result, I have developed a working thesis that positions the concept of retirement as one of the most respected and sought-after phases of life, but also one of the least understood. This is evidenced by the fact that I hear people regularly confess, “I never thought about that…I never figured that would happen, I never considered that would come up…I never imagined I would feel that way.”
Yes, there are the common issues and aha moments that show-up in retirement such as gaining a few extra pounds or the sticker shock that comes with the cost of things Medicare doesn’t cover. However, there are a number of things that you’d never expect, that are a little taboo, and may even seem sacrilegious that can come about and leave retirees feeling out-of-balance, confused, anxious and even lost during their retirement transition.
Since these feelings and issues aren’t common knowledge and remain out of traditional retirement planning conversations, advisors and clients have to come to the realization that they face an ever-increasing possibility of:
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Wasting the first few, and most valuable, years of retirement trying to figure out who they are.
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Wondering why retirement doesn’t look or feel like they thought it would, questioning their decision to retire, dwelling on the past and worrying what they could have done better or different.
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Struggling to replace the things they thought they would be doing but can’t because their back, neck, hip or knee pain is more intensive and limiting than they ever expected.
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Feeling robbed or cheated because of the loss of a spouse or family member, divorce or medical diagnosis that is destroying everything they worked for.
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Recognizing that not everyone ages well and it’s easy for retired people to fall into a rut, unshaven or without make-up for longer and longer periods of time.
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Trying to overcome frustrations with their adult children who think they are a 24/7 bank or always on call and ready to respond to their every little whim or need.
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Thinking no one appreciates them because they weren’t reelected to the condo board or homeowners association, didn’t get invited to be a part of the community dinner or fundraiser or weren’t asked to join a group of friends for a small holiday party.