Advisors have got to reframe, redefine and repackage what they do if they want to maintain revenue and keep clients after they retire, says Gail Graham, CEO of Graham Strategy.

Graham, who formerly led marketing at United Capital, told advisors at the 8th Annual Inside Retirement conference in Dallas that they need to redefine the client experience so that it's distinct from what they offered before clients retired.

Graham stressed that advisors will face more competition from big players like Vanguard, Fidelity and Schwab in providing investment advice, which advisors can't offer as cheaply as those firms can.

"I'm a huge advocate of beginning to separate your investment fees from your advice fees. I know it's going to be hard for us as an industry. I know it's going to be like all of us having to pull the Band-Aid off at the same time," said Graham. "But they are going to start advertising hard. ... Schwab is already doing it with its campaign 'Modern Wealth Management.' If they are modern, what are you?"

Still, an advisor who redefines relationships with clients can provide services that other competitors don't offer.

An advisor needs to become more of a retirement coach who helps clients identify and implement fulfilling choices for their later years, Graham maintained.

A first step in determining how to talk with different clients is to identify their emotional drivers, she said. United Capital, for example, created "The Money Mind" analysis to help assess clients and determine their values.

United Capital found there are basically three kinds of people: Some "people are driven by fear, and it's interesting that 90 percent of financial professionals we tested are fear based. That's why we are good shepherds of other people's money," Graham said. "The fear clients are afraid to retire and are terrified of retirement. The happiness people jump in and spend money. They have their glory days a bit too much. The last group are commitment people, clients who really are more concerned about the next generation, giving back and those kinds of things."

United Capital also found, after looking at more than 18,000 clients, that their number one goal was spending more time with people they love. Another top goal was not being a burden to family members.

She also suggested advisors explore AARP's website and specifically look at its extensive research that is part of its "Life Reimagined" effort, which offers tools that can help advisors help clients build a purpose statement for retirement.

Graham noted it's more important than ever for advisors to work with a couple, not just one spouse. "You have to find a way to be in front of them, and make sure you focus on the women. Not just because she's going to outlive the guy. I hate hearing that. It's not just that. Right now, she values you in ways that he may not."

Women tend to focus more on relationships than do men, who may focus more on cost, Graham said. Women want someone they can talk with, so if an advisor provides that kind of emotional support, it acts as "glue" with clients, she added.

Graham encouraged advisors to also communicate with clients by writing blogs or newsletters about the issues that truly matter to them. "Communicate with your clients in retirement. They now have the time to read your stuff," she quipped.

Expensive events are unnecessary, Graham maintained. Inviting a group of five or six clients to a museum opening, for example, will cost a lot less and will create a memorable experience.

A "gazillion" brochures aren't necessary either, Graham added. Instead, advisors should focus, sharpen and simplify their messages on their websites and in marketing materials so that they are memorable.

"Have a story on why the other guys aren't as good as you. I would build your story on why not to go to robos, why you are better, and you have to believe it. Even be willing to compete with other RIAs," Graham said. "You've got to be able to look in the mirror and be able to say, 'Why am I better?'"