As more Americans become caregivers to older relatives, many are unprepared and face a range of emotional challenges, according to Northwestern Mutual’s 2018 C.A.R.E. study.
In fact, the number of people with caregiving responsibilities, especially among baby boomers, has already increased dramatically. “With lifespans growing longer, the number of 60-somethings with living parents has more than doubled since 1998, to about 10 million, according to an Urban Institute analysis of University of Michigan data, and they are increasingly expensive to care for,” The Wall Street Journal reported Tuesday in an article about baby boomers and retirement.
Kamilah Williams-Kemp, vice president of long-term care at Northwestern Mutual, says most caregivers feel pride in helping family members. “But that’s quickly followed by fatigue, tiredness, then anxiety and fear, which requires time for self-care to recharge, and that looks different depending on the person,” Williams-Kemp said.
The Northwestern Mutual study says 62 percent of caregivers experienced tiredness, 42 percent felt anxiety, 35 percent felt fear, 24 percent were isolated and 12 percent were resentful.
"Caregivers need to prioritize some level of self-care and proactively ask for the help they need themselves," says Williams-Kemp. "As a caregiver myself, I know that having options and resources available can be empowering and help alleviate some of the stress."
Advisors can help their caregiver clients by suggesting they take time for themselves with dinner out, meeting with friends, getting a massage or by recommending a support group.
“The conversation that an advisor can have with their client before there's an actual family problem can really help provide clarity around the types of planning that they can put into place before they're experiencing a challenge involving care,” Williams-Kemp told Financial Advisor magazine.
Some 58 percent of caregivers in the study say they don’t share feelings about caregiving because they don’t want to burden others or be judged, while 42 percent do not feel others can relate.
“They are resilient in the short term to be able to persevere through an illness of a loved one, but many caregiving situations involving aging parents can take place over an extended period of time, which becomes more difficult to muscle through,” Williams-Kemp said.
Experienced caregivers report spending an average of 8.2 hours a day providing care, but for Gen Xers the tradeoffs in their personal and professional lives are comparatively higher than for caregivers overall, which may contribute to the larger impact on their emotional and mental health.