I coach my son’s little league team which is comprised of nine and ten-year old boys. We began our season last week and there were definitely some first-game jitters. But I really didn’t understand the extent of them until a dad approached me after the game.
“Good game coach, I think the kids will definitely get better with their first game under their belt now,” he said.
I replied, “thanks,” but before I could say anything else, he shared something that I didn’t want to hear or see coming.
“Ben told me his front leg was shaking at the plate and that he was scared to get on base because he didn’t know how to slide.”
My heart sank. I was so caught up in the myriad of things I had to do as a coach, that I didn’t tune into what some of the kids might be thinking and going through.
Think about little Ben getting ready to bat in his first game. Instead of his coach being on the mound and his friends in the field, there’s a big kid on the mound throwing as hard as he can, with less control, and trying to strike him out. The field is also full of strangers and you don’t want to disappoint your parents, coaches or teammates with an out.
Something very similar can play out for clients as they step up to the plate of retirement as well. While many clients wouldn’t admit to their legs shaking as they walk out of work for the last time, there can be some retirement jitters because things change when you go from practice to the real game of life in retirement.
Think about when a client leaves work. The people who pitched them projects, tasks and played a supporting role during their work years are all off to the side now. The players on the field change too. Instead of seeing the same people each and every day, there’s less interaction and it’s easy for clients to start feeling all alone. And let’s face it, nobody wants to fail at retirement or disappoint them by their decision to leave work.
The unfortunate part for clients is often times they end up suffering in silence. They don’t have a dad to tell they are scared or a coach to tell them it’s going to be alright. So they struggle and end up turning into statues at the plate.
Statues in baseball are people who are afraid to hit or be hit by the ball, so they just stand there. This concept also transfers over to retirees who get there and do nothing. They sit on the couch, putz around the house, suffocate their spouse because they have no friends, direction or places to go. Because they are afraid to hit or be hit, they pass up opportunities, refusing to pick up the phone and call a friend or try to find and join some sort of new team.