When we talk about anticipation as a stage of transition, we are essentially talking about preparing for an event that hasn’t occurred yet. We might not even have a clear estimated time of arrival. It might never happen at all. But it doesn’t matter during anticipation, because the narrative about the event has already begun in the mind and the life of the individual. And if you wait until the event has occurred to plan for it, you give away this influential interval of time that has the power to positively transform the client’s relationship to their transition and the money that comes with it.
Someone in anticipation is moving through the idea of change (financial and otherwise), and that can be destabilizing. In precisely what areas and to what degree depends on a variety of factors, including the presence and quality of their support system and the expertise of the professionals who guide them.
Areas that are frequently compromised during anticipation are:
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Values
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The ability to think clearly
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Decision-making and prioritizing
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The ability to function well in relationships
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The ability to create or maintain healthy boundaries
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The general ability to handle oneself socially
So what’s the playbook for anticipation? Is there anything you can do to set the stage for the best outcome, and what would the best outcome even look like? Fortunately, there’s plenty you can do, beginning of course with establishing a safe space for whatever your client is experiencing, and normalizing their feelings. The invisible thread that connects the elements of the above list is the primary work of anticipation: identifying and managing expectations. And there can be a lot of them depending on how much of a shared experience anticipation has become for the people around the client. So much goes unsaid during anticipation, and so much is assumed. That doesn’t serve anyone and can lead to disappointment, regrettable decisions and the destruction of relationships. And all before a dime has been received.
What does the best outcome look like? Making certain the client is as prepared as possible for the actual event to occur is the goal. (The event occurs during ending, which I will address in the next article). Instrumental in reaching that goal is helping the client develop as healthy a mindset as possible about the event as well as the transition process. They probably also have some work to do regarding establishing boundaries and communicating about those boundaries.
When you have a playbook for working with clients and co-creating outcomes that are fulfilling during the most chaotic times, you have a playbook for any time. And that playbook can be shared with your clients as you work together, thereby giving them the skills and experience to better handle their next major life event.
Susan Bradley, CFP, CeFT, is the founder of the Sudden Money Institute, which began 17 years ago as a community of practice seeking to better serve their financial planning clients by developing process and tools for the personal side of money and for clients going through transitions. This think tank created the Certified Financial Transitionist (CeFT) designation, and a division for training and certification called the Financial Transitionist Institute. Susan speaks frequently in the United States as well as internationally, and is the author of Sudden Money: Managing a Financial Windfall (Wiley 2000).